Attennnn--tion!

  Janet threw her purse on the bench by the door, to avoid dropping the bags of take-out food on the floor. She managed to haul the slippery bags to the counter and toss them onto it, was no easy task today.

She had sprained her ankle the day before and the pain was increasing with each step she took. The crutch under her arm banged into the door and fell, almost tripping her. She hadn't mastered the technique yet, of holding bags, purse, jacket and crutch all at the same time, while walking and unlocking the door.

Her children, Ben and Mica, strolled in behind her still playing a game they had started on the ride home from practice, totally unaware that their help would be appreciated.


“Okay kids, put the Gameboy away for now and grab some paper plates,” she told them. Janet leaned against the counter and began to pull the hamburgers and fries out of the bags, while holding her foot in the air behind her. A throbbing pain was working it's way up to her calf. “Come on guys, help me out here.”

“Wait, mom,” Mica said. “We're almost done.”

Normally, Janet would have snatched the game up and out of their reach. Today, the obstacle of making her way around the counter and keeping her balance on one good foot, was too much for her.

She sighed and said, “Fine, play the game.” Reaching into the cupboard above her, she pulled down one paper plate, not three, and placed her own food on it. She slid it across the counter before hobbling her way around it, to sit on a bar stool.

Trying to hitch herself up on the stool with one foot and one hand proved to be too much. She gave up and hobbled into the family room, plopping into the recliner. As soon as she was comfortable, she realized her bladder was in need of release and her food was still on the counter. She stared down the hallway where the bathroom was located with dread. It might just as well be a mountain to climb. 

“The next house I buy will have a bathroom right in the middle of the family room. Forget that they won't be able to see the big screen T.V., they'll just have to hang it on the ceiling!” she said. As soon as she managed to inch her way out of the chair, her husband came in the door.

Relief spread over her like a down comforter, help had arrived. “I'm so glad you're home, hon,” she called out.

Her husband Ron came into the den with her plate of food, the hamburger almost completely eaten. “Hi, how'd practice go?” he asked, his mouth full--of her food.

Janet fixed her eyes on the plate. “I stayed in the car, so I don't have a clue how it went.” Her voice had a gritty quality to it now. Every movement on the gimpy ankle made the bathroom seem farther away. She was almost to the hall, when Barney the dog woke up and barked, running into her crutch and knocking it away from her.

 

Barney thought it was a new toy and immediately began to chase it and bark. He would run up to it, then scoot himself back with his constant and irritating bark raising a ruckus.

Now, how does a dog chase an inanimate object like a crutch, you ask. Barney is a curly-haired, black poodle, therefore he thinks anything larger than a banana is his own personal prey. He's quick to subdue the metal thing on the floor, by crunching his teeth firmly into the foam arm protector and shaking it until a part of comes away in his mouth. With his tail wagging in triumph, he trots down the hall with his prize firmly between his teeth.

“No, Barney! No. Stop that, right now,” Janet cries. “Ron, do you think you could lend a hand here?”

Ron jumps up from his prone position on the sofa and picks up the dog. He carries him back to his spot on the sofa, never taking his eyes off the game on the T.V. Totally unaware that his wife can't stand on one foot and pick up the crutch.

Janet is fed up at this point and refuses to ask for help. She bends at the waist, standing on her good leg and lands both hands on the floor next to the crutch, bad ankle hanging behind her in the air. Too late, she realizes this is just the position her bladder can't withstand. Crawling one hand along the floor to reach the crutch, she grabs it and tries to straighten up while she leans on it with both hands, pulling it gradually to her side. She manages to stand and get the torn, and now itchy and uncomfortable arm piece situated.

Ron never even noticed his wife's antics, while he finished off the fries, ketchup drooling all over his chin. Well, after all, Janet didn't get him a napkin did she?

Janet made her way into her bathroom to take care of business, breathless from the painful wait. With a sigh, she went to the bedroom and climbed onto the bed cross ways, unable to trudge back up the hall to the recliner. Grabbing Ron's pillows, she propped her ankle up on them, then laid her head back exhausted against her own. Her eyes closed in relief and she was about to dose off...

“Mom!” Mica screamed, inches from her face.

Janet's head jerked up so fast, she bumped into Mica's.

“Owww, you hit me!” the seven year old wailed.

“Mommy's sorry, honey. But why did you yell like that?” Janet soothed and rubbed the spot on Mica's forehead.

Mica bit her lip, trying to remember what she'd needed. “Oh, where are the cookies, Daddy needs to know.”

Janet laid back on the pillow and took a deep cleansing breath. Her loving, yet spoiled husband didn't quite get it yet, she couldn't be at his beck and call today. Maybe tomorrow she'd fetch and carry for him, but not today. Her tongue rolled around her cheek, “Tell daddy we're out of cookies. If he wants cookies so bad, he can run tot he store and buy them himself.” She relaxed again as she listened to her daughters footsteps padding down the hall. Peace at last.

Janet dozed off and on for a full fifteen minutes, until she heard a giant crashing noise coming from the other end of the house. She kept still and waited. Nothing. The roof didn't cave in. Now she really couldn't stand it. Who had broken what and was it one of her prized vases on display in the dining room? She hobbled onto the one good foot and grabbed the crutch, making her way down the hall as fast as she could.

The rubber tip on the crutch made no noise at all, the other foot was bare, so she was completely undetected as she stepped into the family room. Her family, all three of them, were bending down on the floor, picking up the pieces of a broken picture frame. The prized art work that she'd purchased while on vacation last year, lay torn and surrounded by glass on the floor. The sunset over the ocean was a crumpled and broken scene.

“Shhh...don't wake up mommy,” Ron was saying to the kids.

“Too late,” she said.

Mica stood up, her brown curly hair flopped around her face. “I didn't do it!” she pointed to Ron with one hand, the other one firmly planted on her little hip, which was jutted out like a model.

Janet didn't speak, she leaned on her crutch and stared at the mess.


“Honey, I'll take it and get new glass put in. I'm sorry we woke you,” Ron said. “Here, let me help you to the chair.” Ever so gently, he took her arm. “Honey, open your eyes, I don't want you to fall again.”

Janet's eyes flew open, her lips drawn into a tight line. “Recliner.” She allowed herself to be helped. Ron held her arm while she eased down into the chair. “Back.”

Ron jumped around and pulled the foot of the chair up into position.


Her family huddled together in front of her, waiting. Ron looked more scared than the kids, a little pale around the gills with one finger pushing on his chin.

He started to speak, but she held her hand out and stopped him. “Would you mind bringing me my phone, it's in the pocket of my purse, on the side.” She smiled sweetly and crossed her hands in her lap.

At that moment, Ron resembled a deer caught in the headlights.“I'll do better, I promise. I'll cook and clean, anything you tell me to do...please don't call your mother,” Ron begged, like a child caught with his hand in the aquarium.

A smile slowly spread across her face. “Phone.” Janet was able to relax and forget about everything except the dinner she would enjoy tonight.

Ron, Mica and Ben sulked, shoulders hunched forward, heads down as they made their way to the kitchen to dump the glass and put the broom away.

Within the hour, her mother the Colonel arrived, groceries in hand. “Attennnn-tion!”

Janet enjoyed her dinner immensely, on a tray in the family room with her foot resting on pillows. She enjoyed hearing the orders barked by her mother to the kids and Ron even more, as they cleaned up the kitchen. She could just imagine their faces...